The jump to two. The biggest question is, is it worth it? The short answer is yes. Becoming a first-time mother is like stepping into the wilderness. As for a second-time mother, it's a leap of faith. I knew from a very young age that I wanted to have children sooner than others. I fell pregnant with my eldest at only 17 and welcomed her into the world in February 2022. I longed for my second practically walking out of the hospital. My dreams for growing my family however were far from reality as my ex-partner and I were still living with our parents and falling pregnant too soon after having an emergency ceaserian section posed many risks. I fell pregnant exactly 19 months later, welcoming my littlest in June just past and I could not be happier with my two little girls. 

There are 28 months between my girls, and two-under-three life as a single mother has been a rollercoaster. I would be dishonest to say I didn't have my worries during my last pregnancy about how I would do it all. 6 months in, I finally feel like I have found my rhythm. My biggest fear during my pregnancy was bedtime routines." How on earth am I going tofollow a bedtime routine on my own with two little ones? " I used to ask my mum all of the time. My mum is my biggestsupport and inspiration. Somehow, she survived three of us under the age of five on her own—7 pm bedtime routine, abath every night. I knew if she could do it, maybe I could survive too. Spoiler alert - I'm still surviving!

It is true what they say. No matter how many more you have after you're first, they will slide right into your routines. Do not get me wrong, I still have days i where feel super overwhelmed. Juggling the girls, the house, work and social life gets a little crazy sometimes not to mention all the unexpected events life throws at you from time to time. I wanted our first Christmas together in our new home to be extra special this year. Truth be told, I'm struggling. A lot. I feel an unprecedented amount of pressure to give my girls the best Christmas I can. I think we forget how many extra tasks this time of year gives us. Over the last few years attending five Santa grottos and spending exponential amounts on looking at some lights in a forest has been forced onto us parents as the pinnacle of the season, not to mention the first and 24th of December boxes, elf on the shelf and 101 Christmas parties to attend. It's no wonder we mothers are exhausted. 

If it is any consolation, I do have what may be subjectively good news for you. Pregnancy is the biggest hurdle. Pregnancy is hard on its own without a toddler to run after. I was extremely fearful given the troubles I faced during my pregnancy how life was going to be with two kids. It wasn't long after I excitedly read my Clearblue I started to have serious doubts about my ability to do it all. As scary as it seemed at the time, 6 months later I can happily admit that the pregnancy was a lot harder than handling a newborn and toddler at the same time. I have most of my energy back. As much as I like to complain to my close ones about my daily little struggles, I think I secretly love the rush of it all. I count my lucky stars every day that I get to be a mum to my two amazing babies. They keep me on my feet for sure but I wouldn't have it any other way. I am extremely grateful to have such an incredible support system of family, friends and even neighbours who are always there to help.

If I have any tips for mothers out there, find mum friends. Over the last year or so I found myself four amazing friends who all have children in the same age groups. I may not have the key to balancing life in motherhood but one thing I know indubitably is that forming relationships with other mothers is paramount. It feels so good to be able to talk to others who relate to your lifestyle. Not only have we made friends but so have all of our children which I find special. 

I was more shocked than expected when I was pregnant the second time around. My symptoms were so different I was entirely convinced I was having a boy. I assumed in the months leading up to falling pregnant that it would be all the same as the first time around. When they say no two pregnancies are the same, that goes for all of your own too. The same goes for your babies too. I thought I would be the expert this time around however Rosie has an entirely different personality, likes and dislikes already. For example, Jasmine since the week she was welcomed home has adored her precious pacifiers. Rosie on the other hand, well quite literally has always preferred her hand and more specifically, her thumb. Rosie's weaning journey has been much different to Jasmines too.

Gathering my thoughts and experiences, I am in awe. I surely cannot put into words how cherishable it is to watch your baby become a sibling. Throughout all the ups and downs I must say it is a truly remarkable experience <3